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Residential Community

Flatmate Issues

FLATMATE ISSUES

Check out this page for tips on how to manage issues you are having with your flatmates and to discover who to speak to when you have a flat issue.

You won’t always get along with everyone in your flat but it is important to recognise when flat conflicts can be resolved and aim to resolve them quickly to avoid further conflict. Often flat conflicts are a simple misunderstanding and can be resolved quite easily if you use initiative and open communication.

The best place to start is to have a conversation with your flatmate!

How to have a conversation with your flatmates about flat issues

Keep reading for all our tips and tricks!

Approach issues quickly and directly

  • The best thing to do when there is a flat issue is to address the issue in the moment (or just after). Addressing the issue at the time stops the issue from dragging on and gives you the opportunity to explain how it is affecting you in that moment.
  • When having a conversation with your flatmate be polite but firm. Explain what is exactly bothering you and offer suggestions on how to solve the issue. Don’t accuse your flatmate and make sure they have the opportunity to voice their own concerns as well.
  • Some students have never lived away from home before and often don’t realise how their behaviour can affect others.

Agree on a compromise and set rules

  • Consider ways in which you and your flatmate can make compromises to make your flat more liveable. If your flatmate doesn’t suggest anything, make the conscious effort to suggest some yourself.
  • If it seems appropriate, you can include the rest of your flat in a discussion about flat rules. Some flat issues can be affecting more than one person and creating rules as a flat can lead to harmonious living.

Some Examples of compromises and flat rules:

  • If your flatmate avoids taking the bins out - as a household you could create a bin rota that is fair for all
  • If your flatmate doesn’t wash their dishes for several days - compromise on an appropriate timeline for washing dishes, such as a 24-hour grace period
  • If your flatmate is putting items on your fridge shelf - discuss why this has been happening, it may be that fridge space wasn’t allocated evenly to begin with and this needs to be adjusted as a flat.

Don't Retaliate

  • It can be really easy to take a passive-aggressive approach to handle flatmate issues. However, this can have an even further negative impact on your overall flat and will only escalate the situation.
  • It can also have the reverse affect and result with the Residential Community Team having a discussion with you about your own behaviour. So you are better to address the issue directly and seek help if you need it.
  • Don’t forget you are going to have to live in this flat for the remainder of the academic year so you need to find a way to get along as a flat.

Don't forget that tolerance is important too!

  • Just because your flatmate does something differently to you, doesn’t necessarily mean it is the wrong way. Everyone has grown up knowing a different way of doing things and we need to appreciate this. There is no one right way to do something.
  • It is important to strike a balance between difference of behaviour and disruptive behaviour.

Check out some of the most common flat issues students experience!

Keep reading for hot tips below!

Kitchen Bins

  • It can be frustrating when the same people are the ones always taking the bins out. Especially when others in the flat take it for granted.
  • Not emptying your bin can increase the risk of pests such as mice or bugs, so it is best to find a solution sooner rather than later.
  • HOT TIP: Make a bin rota with your flat. A bin rota helps to share the responsibility across everyone in the flat. There is a bin rota template in your kitchen for your flat to fill out. If you need a new one, contact the Residential Community Team.
  • Please remember, the Campus Cleaning Services will not empty your bin, so be as proactive as you can!

Fridge Space and Kitchen Items

  • Unfortunately, residents sometimes accidentally or intentionally take food, borrow kitchen items, or use shelf space belonging to their flatmates; this can negatively affect the community in your flat. Speak with your flat mates when you move in about your expectations around sharing food to set clear boundaries.
  • You should have enough space in the kitchens for everyone to have a dry food store and space in the fridge and freezer. If this isn’t the case then you could organise a meeting as a flat and make sure everyone has equal space.
  • If food is going missing or your items are being used, find a way to address this right away. It could be that your flatmates kitchen items are yet to arrive or they have struggled to buy food that week and may actually need further support. Having an open conversation with the flat about this, avoid accusing people and address the flat generically.
  • DON’T FORGET: That some of your flatmates may arrive late to the flat and may have missed out on being allocated space or aren’t aware of flat rules previously agreed upon. It is always worth having further conversations about space and kitchen items each term to make sure everyone in the flat is on the same page.

Guests and Visitors

  • It can be challenging when flatmates have people over. Your flatmates are allowed to have visitors and guests but it is always good to set some boundaries with the entire flat so you are all on the same page.
  • Socialising with your new flat mates and other residential students is important for building a community on campus. But as a flat you also need to be mindful of flatmates wanting to study or use the communal space.
  • Organise for your flatmates to give you the heads up when they are having people over and set boundaries around quiet times.
  • HOT TIP: If you regularly have friends over to cook together, consider rotating flats so you aren’t always gathering in the same flat every week. This will open up communal spaces for others to use.

Messy Kitchens

  • Messy kitchens are often a cause of conflict within flats. The best way to handle mess and dirty dishes is to speak to your flat mates all together about how you will manage the daily cleaning and tidying of your communal areas such as kitchens and bathrooms as a flat.
  • HOT TIP: Don’t forget that everyone has been brought up with different ways of doing things. Try and find a happy medium, rather than expect someone to match your way of living.
  • As a flat you are responsible for keeping your flat communal areas clean and tidy. Although the Cleaning Team comes once a week to clean communal areas, they can refuse to clean if the flat is untidy and this can sometimes result in a whole flat fine.
  • DON’T FORGET: Messy kitchen conflicts can often result in revenge tactics out of frustration if you feel you aren’t getting anywhere with your flat. Don’t retaliate, speak to the Residential Community Team instead.

HOT TIP!

Create a WhatsApp chat for you and your flatmates to discuss flat issues and to organise face to face conversation!

If you are still having issues after trying to address it, speak to someone!

Keep reading for contact information for the Residential Community Team

Residential Community Team

The Residential Community Team are the best team to speak to when you are having ongoing issues within your flat. They can speak to students, organise mediation sessions, or escalate the situation if needed.

Find them in your Residence Hubs in the evenings!

Our staff are available in your Residence Hub every evening between 7pm - 9pm.

Visit us at the RCT Hub in Red Square:

Our staff are available in the RCT hub from 9am-11pm Monday to Friday, and 12pm-11pm Saturday and Sunday.

If you would prefer to organise a time to speak with someone or communicate via email complete our Triage Form:

Online Triage Form (office.com)

Don't forget!

It is best to speak to your flatmates as soon as possible and set boundaries.

You are better to try and resolve the issue as a flat first before contacting the Residential Community Team

Don’t seek revenge, speak to the Residential Community Team instead

Create group chats, bin rotas, and flat rules to build a harmonious flat

You may not all be friends but you need to find a way to live together amicably