Whether you are in a longer or shorter term sexual relationship, it is worth taking some time to consider how you can keep this aspect of the relationship healthy and enjoyable. This will involve thinking about emotional as well as physical aspects of sex. 

What is a healthy sexual relationship? 

Ideas about what constitutes a healthy sexual relationship will vary enormously, as people have such differing personal and cultural perspectives on sex. However, there are some basic principles that can help to keep sexual interactions/relationships healthy. These include: 

• An ability to communicate with one another about what you want/don’t want and enjoy/don’t enjoy
• Mutual respect for one another, which will involve full consent being given for any sexual contact.
• Taking steps to protect yourself and your sexual partner(s) (e.g. from STIs (sexually transmitted diseases) and/or unwanted pregnancies)

What is consent?

Take a look at these videos:

Consent, within the context of sexual interaction, refers to the act and ability for anyone involved in sexual contact to make conscious, free and positive decisions regarding their engagement with sexual activity.  

Consent:

•  is about making and conveying informed, free and conscious decisions without pressure or coercion.  
• cannot be given if you are intoxicated as substance use can hinder the ability to make clear and conscious decisions. 
• can be given in a number of ways, not just verbally. The absence of a ‘no’ does not mean a ‘yes’! 

• can be rescinded at any time or at any point during, before or after the sexual act/contact 
• must be gained each time you engage in sexual activity and if you change to different forms of sexual contact (within the same second, minute, hour, day, week, year, 10 years etc). 

Sexual Contact:  

• without consent is illegal. If someone carries out a sexual act on another person without consent, they can be charged with a sexual offence (like rape or sexual assault). This covers sexual touching, oral, anal and vaginal sex with a penis or with any other type of object. 
• Is a mutual decision and therefore nobody is obliged to perform any sexual acts with another person at any time 

Keeping sexual relationships healthy and consensual

Here are some tips to keeping your sexual relationship healthy and consensual:

• Think about and discuss with your partner- what you want, like and what you do not like or want 
• Make sure you and your partner are happy with both of your decisions 
• Remember your sexuality is individual and personal  
• Remember it is your body and your choice about what you do with it 
• Respect each other decisions 

• Feel confident and free to change your mind and to convey this as soon as you feel uncomfortable 
• Try to give pleasure to each other- sex is not one sided and should be enjoyed by both parties 
• Read each other’s body language and check in with the other person to make sure they are happy and comfortable 
• Stop if you are unsure if the other person is happy with what is happening and gain consent if you wish to change the activity you are engaging in 
• Do not pressure anyone to engage in sexual contact as this is abusive behaviour 

• Educate yourself on legal aspects of sex and consent, and on sexual health/pregnancy and contraception 
• Plan and discuss what to do and where you will go if things do not go to plan- such as a condom splits 

Support and further information

Whether you are in a longer or shorter term sexual relationship, it is worth taking some time to consider how you can keep this aspect of the relationship healthy and enjoyable. This will involve thinking about emotional as well as physical aspects of sex.

At Warwick

Wellbeing and Support Services

Resources on consent and sexual violence prevention: https://www2.warwick.ac.uk/services/supportservices/preventionandsupport/sexualviolence/ 

We have a Sexual and Domestic Violence Adviser within our Wellbeing Team who can offer emotional and practical support to any member of the university who has been affected by these forms of abuse https://warwick.ac.uk/services/wss/topics/preventionandsupport/sexualviolence/supportforsurvivors/ 

Report and Support

You can report cases of sexual abuse and violence to the University via our Report and Support Service- for further information - https://reportandsupport.warwick.ac.uk/ 

Students' Union

Consent and prevention campaign and training courses - https://www.warwicksu.com/campaigns-communities/campaigns/active/welfare/consent/ 

Sexual health guidance - https://www.warwicksu.com/help-support/health/sexualhealth/ 

Student Union sexual violence guidance - https://www.warwicksu.com/help-support/health/sexual-violence-support/ 

Other and External Services

Sexual Health Support

University of Warwick Health Centre- Sexual Health Support https://www.uwhc.org.uk/health-information/sexual-health-at-uwhc/ 

NHS Sexual Health Support - http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/Sexualhealthtopics/Pages/Sexual-health-hub.aspx 

Other Organisations and Sites

https://www.warwickshire.gov.uk/health-protection/sexual-health-relationships-1/1 

http://www.relate.org.uk/ 

https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-informed/about-sexual-violence/sexual-consent/ 

http://www.brook.org.uk/your-life/category/relationships 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/bwytJQcDBXDfLGlVb0vHCk/category-sex-relationships 

http://www.bishuk.com/sex/ 

https://www.disrespectnobody.co.uk/ 

http://pauseplaystop.org.uk/pause/ 

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